I understand that you are having a bad day.
I understand that you don’t feel like working.
I understand that things happen and functioning as normal is hard.
I don’t understand immaturity in handling emotions.
I don’t understand willful ignorance towards others.
I don’t understand disrespect.
I don’t understand selfishness.
I don’t understand manipulation.
You hurt me. Which sucks because you don’t care about anyone but yourself so how could someone like you hurt me? Its obvious its your problem. It’s obvious you are no longer interested in being here anymore. It’s obvious that you don’t care about anyone but yourself. Its obvious you’re just here because you have nothing else to do.
You hurt me when you said my emotions don’t need to be heard. You hurt me when you said you wanted accountability and then pushed it away. You hurt me when you tried to make me feel like I was wrong for being hurt by you. You hurt me when you were hurting and didn’t try to mend it. You hurt me by letting yourself hurt alone when you didn’t have to. You hurt me by hurting yourself.
It’s not my silence that hurts; its yours. Its your silence to your true self that makes me angry. You hurt for no reason. You do this to yourself , and I wanted to help. But when you push me away, you push yourself further into the abyss of loneliness.
So when you decide to speak, when you finally want to share, notice that no one else is there. And look at yourself, your posture, your arms, your heart, and realize that you were the one who put yourself there.
Realize that you didn’t silence me, you silenced yourself.